One sore subject that occurs with some newly engaged couples is what do when you do not like the engagement ring your loved one presented you with as they got down on one knee and made their proposal. Of course you already accepted and were excited about the proposal, even when he popped open the ring box, and there staring you in the face was a beautiful ring, he carefully selected and spent months saving to buy just for you, yet you simply disliked.
This type of situation is not as uncommon as you may believe. Some people feel the ring does not reflect their own personal tastes in jewellery. The ring could be too big and actually need to be resized. Some people simply do not like diamonds and would prefer some other precious gemstone for their engagement ring. There are also other reasons, like they do not like the band, how the gemstones are arranged in the setting, and so on.
The best thing to do, so you are not stuck wearing and showing off a ring you do not really like is to be honest with yourself and your loved one. Do allow yourselves to savor the moment of being recently engaged, but do not let too much time pass. A good waiting period is a few days to a week, otherwise it will become even more difficult to bring up the subject.
Find a quiet location where you can sit down with your loved one where you will not be interrupted. Let them know how much you love them and are happy you are engaged, as this can help “break the ice.” Then, let them know you do not like the engagement ring and why you dislike it.
Simply stating you do not like the ring can result in feelings of resentment and hurt. By providing your loved one with specific reasons, even though they might still feel hurt, it does let them know why so they are not left wondering if they did something wrong. Then, the next step is to discuss, as a couple, viable solutions so that you will have a ring you truly like.
Here’s a compassionate, practical guide to help you navigate what to do when your engagement ring isn’t what you hoped for.
1. Take a Moment Before Reacting
Your first instinct might be disappointment or confusion, but it’s important to pause before saying anything. Engagements are emotional events, and your partner likely spent a lot of time and thought choosing that ring.
Give yourself time to adjust to the idea and see if your feelings change after wearing it for a few days. Sometimes, initial surprise fades into appreciation.
2. Understand Why You Don’t Like It
Before deciding what to do, identify exactly what feels off:
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Is it the style (too vintage, too modern, too simple)?
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The stone shape or size?
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The metal colour (yellow gold vs. white gold)?
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Or maybe it just doesn’t match your personality or lifestyle.
Understanding what you don’t like will help you communicate your thoughts clearly—and find a solution that feels right.
3. Explore Your Options
Once you’ve had the conversation, you have several ways to make things right—without losing the sentiment behind the ring.
Option 1 – Pick Out a Different Setting
If it is the setting you dislike, but like the gemstones your fiancé selected, you can have the gemstones taken out of the original setting and put into one you like better.
Option 2 – Have the Ring Transformed Into a New Piece
You can take the existing engagement ring and have a new custom engagement ring made using the existing materials and gemstones. This way, your finished ring still embodies the original one you fiancé selected, but now suits your tastes.
Option 3 – Switch Out/Modify the Gemstones
If you like the band, but not the gemstones, you can have these removed and replaced with ones you like. You could also have larger gemstones broken down into smaller pieces and used to complement a different center piece gemstone.
Option 4: Redesign the Existing Ring
You can keep the original stone or band but work with a jeweller like Serli & Siroan to redesign it in a way that better reflects your style. Whether it’s resetting the diamond, changing the metal, or adding side stones, redesigning lets you preserve the emotional value while making it your own.
Option 5: Exchange It
If the ring is new and purchased from a reputable jeweller, there may be an exchange or upgrade policy. You could choose a new design together that both of you love.
Option 6 Customize a New Ring
Some couples decide to design a custom engagement ring from scratch. This option ensures that every detail—cut, colour, metal, and setting—matches your vision perfectly.
Option 7: Keep It as a Memory
If you prefer not to change the original ring, consider keeping it as a sentimental keepsake and later getting a second ring that suits your daily wear or personality better.
4. Work with a Trusted Jeweller
Choosing the right jeweller makes all the difference. A professional can help you explore options without compromising the value or meaning of your current ring.
At Serli & Siroan, our expert designers specialize in:
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Redesigning and resetting engagement rings
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Custom ring creation tailored to your style
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Stone upgrades and metal transformations
Our goal is to help you fall in love with your ring—both emotionally and aesthetically.
Final Thoughts
Disliking your engagement ring doesn’t mean you’re ungrateful—it means you want something that truly represents your personality and your partnership. With honest communication and expert guidance, you can find a solution that makes you proud to wear your ring every day.
At Serli & Siroan, we believe every engagement ring should tell your story beautifully. Whether it’s a simple tweak or a full redesign, our team will help you create a piece that feels authentically you.
Keep in mind these are just a few of your options and there could be more depending on the exact reasons you do not like your engagement ring. For further ideas or assistance in transforming your engagement ring into one you will like, stop by or contact Serli & Siroan at 416-944-3863 today!